How do you count children in the wedding guest list?

Short answer

Count each child as one guest, but only if you have explicitly invited them. If children are not invited, list no one under their parents' names.

The cleanest way to build your guest list is to treat every child as an individual seat, food portion and place card. This keeps your numbers accurate for the venue and caterer. It also stops confusion when you send out invitations.

If you are inviting children, put their names on the invitation addressed to their parents. Write the child's name on the inner envelope or in the address line so there is no doubt. If you are not inviting children, write only the adults' names. Do not add a note saying 'adults only' on the main envelope, as this can feel blunt. A separate line on the invitation or on your wedding website is kinder.

Some couples choose to invite only certain children, such as family members or children in the wedding party. If you do this, be ready for questions and answer them with a simple, consistent rule. You do not need to explain your reasons in detail.

Remember that some venues and religious buildings have their own rules about children, and these can vary. Check with your venue and, if you are having a religious ceremony, ask your place of worship what they allow.