How do you ask guests if they are bringing children when RSVPing?

Clarity is kinder than implication. Instead of writing a generic 'adults only', list the names of the people invited on the RSVP card. If you are inviting a whole family, write each child's name. If you are only inviting the adults, leave the children's names off.

You can add a short line such as 'We have reserved [number] seats in your honour'. This makes it obvious who is invited without being rude. For digital RSVPs, include a dropdown or tick box asking how many children will attend and their ages.

If a guest asks whether their child can come, reply promptly and kindly. Say what you have planned and thank them for asking. If you cannot accommodate them, offer a warm alternative rather than leaving them to guess.

Some families may have complex arrangements, such as shared custody. In these cases, a quick phone call or message can prevent misunderstandings and ensure everyone feels considered.