Who should I send a save the date card to?

Short answer

Send save the dates to anyone you are certain will be invited to the wedding. This usually means close family, close friends and anyone you cannot imagine celebrating without. If you are unsure about someone, wait until your guest list is final.

Start with the people you know for certain will be invited. That normally includes immediate family, close friends and anyone who would need to travel, arrange time off work or book childcare. Save the dates are a courtesy, not a formal invitation, so they give people a heads up before the full invitation arrives.

If your guest list is still in flux, hold off until you are more confident. It is far easier to send a save the date late than to uninvite someone. For anyone you are genuinely unsure about, wait. You can always send them a full invitation later, even if they did not receive a save the date.

Think about who would be hurt if they found out about the wedding from someone else. Those people should definitely be on your save the date list. For larger weddings, some couples send save the dates to everyone on the guest list, but that is not essential. The key is to be kind and clear. If you have a small ceremony and a bigger party later, you may send save the dates only to those invited to both parts.