How do you ask for an RSVP?

Short answer

Ask directly and kindly with a clear date. For example: 'Please let us know by 1 May whether you can join us. You can reply on our wedding website or by text to [your number].' This makes it easy and gives a deadline.

The best way to ask for an RSVP is to be clear, friendly and specific. Put the request on your invitation, your wedding website and any e-invite. Say exactly what you need: whether the guest can come, how many people are in their party, and any dietary needs. Give a deadline that is at least two weeks before your final numbers are due to the venue.

If you are asking in person or by phone, keep it light. Say something like: 'We'd love to know if you can make it by the end of the month. No pressure, but it helps us with seating.' Avoid guilt or pressure. Some guests may be deciding about travel or childcare, so give them time.

For guests who have not replied by the deadline, send a gentle reminder. A short message works well: 'Just checking in about our wedding on 14 June. We'd love to know if you can join us. No worries if not.' This is polite and gives them an easy way to decline.

If you are a parent or bridal party member helping with RSVPs, always ask the couple how they want replies collected. Then follow their system, whether that is a spreadsheet, a website or a simple list.