How do you write modern wedding vows?

Start by making a list of what you love about your partner and what you promise to bring to your marriage. Think about the small, everyday things as well as the big ones, like making tea, listening properly or being patient on difficult days. Modern vows often mix humour with sincerity, so it is fine to include a gentle joke if it sounds like you.

Agree on a rough structure with your partner so one of you is not much longer than the other. A simple shape is: address each other, say what they mean to you, make three or four promises, and end with a line about choosing them for life. Write in the present tense and use "I promise" or "I will" rather than "I hope".

Read your vows aloud several times. If a sentence feels awkward, change it. You do not need to memorise them, but you should know them well enough to look up often. Practise with a friend or in front of a mirror. Keep a copy with your registrar or celebrant in case you get emotional on the day. There is no legal wording you must use for personal vows in a civil ceremony, but your registrar must approve them first, so check before the wedding.