How long before a proposal?

Short answer

There is no set rule, but most couples are together for two to three years before a proposal. Take the time you need to feel sure, and let the timing reflect your relationship, not a deadline.

There is no legal or traditional requirement for how long you should be together before proposing. In the UK, the average couple knows each other for a few years before getting engaged, but plenty of couples propose sooner or later, and that is fine. What matters is that you both feel ready for marriage, not just for a wedding.

Before you propose, think about whether you have talked through the big things: where you want to live, whether you want children, how you handle money, and what marriage means to each of you. A proposal is a promise, so it helps to know you are on the same page. If you are unsure, it is okay to wait. There is no prize for proposing quickly.

If you are planning a proposal around a holiday, birthday or anniversary, give yourself a few weeks to arrange rings, a photographer or a special location. But do not let the planning take over. The proposal itself can be simple and private, and the engagement can last as long as you like. In the UK, there is no time limit between getting engaged and giving notice of marriage, so you can take a year or more to plan your wedding.

One thing to keep in mind: if you want a specific wedding date, work backwards from that. Notice of marriage must be given at least 28 days before the ceremony in England and Wales, and 29 days in Scotland, so factor that in when you choose your proposal date.