Something Old, New, Borrowed and Blue: Ideas and Meaning

The rhyme is a British wedding custom that dates back centuries. The full version goes: something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and a silver sixpence in your shoe. The idea is that each item brings good luck to the marriage. Something old represents continuity with your family and your past. Something new stands for hope and the new life you are starting. Something borrowed is meant to bring happiness from a happily married friend or relative, and something blue symbolises fidelity, love and loyalty. The silver sixpence was a wish for financial prosperity, but coins are rarely used now. You can adapt the tradition to fit your own beliefs, budget and family shape. Many couples enjoy the symbolism even if they do not see it as superstition. You can include all four items, or just the ones that feel meaningful to you. There is no legal requirement for any of them, so feel free to make the tradition your own.

Traditionally, the bride's family provided something old, and the groom's family gave something new. The bride's friends or bridesmaids usually supplied something borrowed, and something blue was often sewn into the hem of the dress or worn as a garter. In modern weddings, anyone can provide any item. You might choose your mum's vintage handkerchief as something old, a new necklace from your partner as something new, a friend's bracelet as something borrowed, and blue shoes as something blue. Yes, old and borrowed can be the same item. A piece of jewellery that belonged to your grandmother and is lent to you by your aunt counts for both. The same goes for new and blue, such as a new blue handbag. There are no rules about who gives what, so ask the people you love to help you gather the items. For same-sex couples, the tradition works exactly the same, with each partner choosing their own four items or sharing them.

You can update each element to suit your style, culture and budget. Here are practical ideas for each one.

• Something old: a family heirloom, a piece of lace from a parent's wedding dress, a vintage brooch pinned to your bouquet, your grandmother's ring, or a photograph of a loved one in your pocket.
• Something new: your wedding dress or suit, new shoes, a new watch, a new piece of jewellery, or a new handkerchief embroidered with your wedding date.
• Something borrowed: a friend's veil, a sibling's cufflinks, a parent's clutch bag, or a scarf from a couple you admire. Borrowing from someone with a happy marriage is the traditional choice.
• Something blue: blue shoes, a blue ribbon sewn inside your outfit, blue nail polish, a blue garter, blue earrings, or a blue stitch on your jacket lining.
• The silver sixpence: you can use a modern coin with a hole, a lucky coin from your birth year, or skip it entirely. Some couples use a small silver charm instead.

For a tea length dress, a short veil works best. A shoulder length or elbow length veil finishes neatly with the hemline and does not overwhelm the outfit. A birdcage veil or a fingertip veil also suits tea length dresses well. For a beach wedding, choose a shorter veil because wind can be a problem. A shoulder length or elbow length veil is practical and stays in place better than a long cathedral veil. You could also skip a veil and wear a flower crown, a headband or a simple hairpin instead. For an outdoor wedding in a garden or woodland, a fingertip length veil is a good balance. It gives you the traditional look without dragging on grass or mud. If you want a longer veil outdoors, choose a chapel length veil and have someone hold it for photos. The longest veil length available is a cathedral veil, which trails about two and a half metres beyond the dress. Some designers make royal or monarch length veils that are even longer, but they are rare and usually custom made. The length of a veil does not say anything about your personality. It is simply a style choice based on your dress, venue and comfort. Long veils look formal and dramatic, while short veils look modern and practical.

Comfort starts with the right fit. Buy shoes that are true to size and break them in before the wedding. Wear them around the house for a few hours each day for a couple of weeks. Use cushioned insoles or gel pads inside the shoes to soften the soles. For heels, choose a block heel or a wedge instead of a stiletto, as they give more stability. If you are wearing flats, look for ballet pumps or loafers with a padded footbed. For men, comfortable options include leather loafers, brogues or smart trainers that match the suit. Make sure the leather is soft and the sole has some grip. You can also bring a second pair of shoes for the evening, such as slippers or trainers, to change into after the ceremony and photos. Break in both pairs before the day. If you are standing for a long time, consider a small heel or a platform sole. There is no single most comfortable shoe for everyone, so try several pairs and walk in them for at least ten minutes in the shop. Remember that your shoes will be hidden under most dresses, so comfort can come before style.

The essential accessories are your outfit, shoes, jewellery, veil or headpiece, and something to carry, such as a bouquet or a clutch bag. You may also want a shawl or jacket for cold weather, a hair accessory, and a handkerchief. For men, accessories include cufflinks, a tie or bow tie, pocket square, and sometimes a waistcoat. You do not need to buy everything at once. Start with the outfit, then choose accessories that match it. Buy shoes early so you can break them in. Buy jewellery and hair accessories closer to the wedding, once your outfit is final. A good timeline is to have your outfit at least three months before the wedding, shoes at least two months before, and smaller accessories about a month before. This gives you time to return or exchange items that do not work. The cost of accessories varies widely, but you do not need to spend a lot. You can borrow jewellery, buy second hand, or make your own hair accessories. Focus on a few quality pieces that you will wear again, rather than buying many items you will only use once.